Little 'm' mentoring

Today I got an email from my boss asking me if I was up for another round of library mentoring. Last spring we hired a new staff member and my boss thought it would be nice for the 2 most recently hired people (whether they be professional or support staff) to take said new hire out to lunch and tell them how life really is at the library. Nothing too formal or anything; just a lowercase 'm' mentoring thing. It should include: things to look out for (being anywhere near the reference desk at 5 with your nametag on during midterms), things to expect (some offices on campus don't seem to answer phones, only email), and stuff we wished someone had told us when we started (that our boss has her own language and that there is in fact now a list of her sayings with translations available for staff use).

This will be my last go-round on the welcoming committee as I am finally the 3rd most recent full-time hire on staff. (Where did those 3 1/2 years go???) This really saddened me as it means I can no longer use the "I'm new here" excuse. (I was once told I could use it for 3 years.) But it got me thinking about what type of wisdom I want to impart on our "new" hire. He's the husband of one of the librarians (who might still read this blog?) who stepped in as a temporary secretary this summer, so he's clearly got more going for him than I did when I started. What essential knowledge of this place and community have I gleaned in the three and half years I've been here? Here's what I've come up with so far:

• People assume anyone here with a nametag is a librarian. 
• Per previous statement, they will ask all sorts of weird questions. Answer what you can, and pass off the rest.
• First floor of the library is always cold. Dress or stash sweaters etc. at work accordingly.
• Three offices in the library have candy. Each has their own style/flavors. Learn them.
• Memorizing the room numbers in this building is helpful during the first week of classes when everyone confuses this building with the similarly named building across the street. There are no identical room numbers.
• Despite having worked at the college for months, you will still be introduced by our boss at every single holiday party this winter.
• There is always an airing of some Christmas-y special/DVD before break. If we play our cards right, it will be SNL. Just don't remind her of how many swear words are in it.
• We celebrate every holiday with a bag of candy here. Halloween, Easter, Valentine's Day. Bag of candy.
• There are like 5 tea drinkers in this library. If you are ever in need of a tea bag, you can find one. I have like 7 different kinds in my office alone.
• The library staff travels in a pack to just about everything, traditionally gathering at the Circ Desk or coffee shop before we head out to something.

And those are just the things from that job. There are a few things from other jobs I've held that I really wish I knew before I started. For example, flips flops, while not usually loud on carpet, sound really freaking loud when you're doing rounds through a silent study room that requires you to use special quiet keyboards. Also, students studying in said quiet space will shoot daggers out of their eyes at you. Or people will consistently call you ma'am (at 21) even though they are old enough to be your grandparents. Or that people will expect you to work miracles finding articles from just a line or two description, and then when you do somehow find them, you will only set up further miraculous expectations.

What have you learned about your job, work environment, or coworkers that you'd pass on to a new hire?

--------------------------
Post word total: 664
Overall word total: 664
Words left to write: 24,336